I’ve been having some crazy dreams and visions the last couple weeks, and since I recently finished Monica Ten-Kate’s ‘Messages from Above,’ I’ve been trying to tune in to signs from spirit.

I want to tell this story, but there are so many pieces, I’m going to try to share it chronologically. Apologies for run-on sentences or long trains-of-thought.

My aunt passed away two months before my angel in 2015. She and I had a connection that I never understood. When she passed suddenly and unexpectedly, I thought for sure she went to Heaven to help my son through his battle with cancer. Instead, I believe she was waiting for him as he ascended to Heaven.

Her birthday was the first of this month. My mom, who is battling her own cancer now, said she was sad she didn’t get a message from her sister on her birthday. I asked my aunt to send me a fountain (she let us swim in a decorative fountain one summer at an arts festival when it was nearly 100 degrees). I looked everywhere for two weeks and never saw a fountain. Then, I was in my car with my mom and there it was, a pond with a huge fountain in its center. We only saw it because I missed a turn. Moments later, my mom found a feather, her symbol for her sister.

Those of you who follow me know that I once asked my angel for a sign and told him I wanted a purple diamond. The next day my friend from work found a bracelet that was her grandma’s. She sent a photo and the center stone was a diamond-shaped amethyst—my purple diamond.

I had a dream about my cousin last week. I emailed his mom, my aunt, who is also an angel mama, and told her about my dream. In my dream, my cousin and I were filming a video for YouTube when a tornado blew through. We held on to one another while the storm passed. She said the day I emailed her, my cousin had posted his very first gardening YouTube video.

One of my dearest friends lost her dad this past week. In the last two days, Our group of friends rallied and we collectively sent some things to her family to let them know we love them and are thinking of them during this tough time.

I had thought about asking her dad for a sign, hoping to get a healing message for my friend. I’ve heard most mediums cannot read those close to them, so I assumed it wouldn’t happen. Today, I got an Instagram message from a loss mom who read Monica’s book and she contacted me. I also messaged another loss mom whose son had the same name as mine, and we both sang to our sons as they transitioned to Heaven.

As I was driving home from visiting my grandpa, I decided to play the song I sang to my son, ‘The Rainbow Connection.’ I took a long way home, driving by an old pumpkin patch and a different part of town than we typically see. Cars in front of me came to an abrupt stop and I looked to my left. There was a big sign in a yard that read ‘Happy Birthday Papa.’ My girlfriend’s dad had hung on just past his 82nd birthday and his grandkids called him Papa.

I called my friend to tell her I had a clear sign from her dad. As we talked, I mentioned the purple diamond and the song that played. She was with her sister at the time and texted me right after, wearing a ring with a purple gem that was her dad’s mother’s, and her sister said she played ‘The Rainbow Connection’ on the drive home during one of her last visits with their dad. She had recently posted the lyrics to Instagram.

I’m telling you, I couldn’t make this stuff up. I don’t know for sure what is happening with me physically, psychically, or psychologically. But I know, deep inside my heart, that our loved ones want to and will make contact to let us know that they are at peace. And if I can pass any message of comfort, I absolutely will.

As a bereaved mother, I have hit the deepest and most painful levels of grief. But I still believe.

I will always believe. 👼🏻