Why I’m #1

Child loss teaches invaluable lessons. Some seem obvious, like ‘don’t take anything for granted,’ because you don’t know how long you may have it.

But there’s an important lesson I continue to learn after caring for a terminally I’ll child who I now parent in Heaven. And that is that I have to respect, admire, treat and take care of myself above all others.

It’s a lesson that is impossible to grasp when you’re caring for a sick child. There was nothing anyone could say to me – not his doctors, not his nurses, not my family, not my doctors – that could convince me that anything, even my own health, was more important than him.

I have always been a people pleaser by nature. Sorry, Mom, but I blame you for that. She’s the same way. We both have always cared for others – their health, their well-being, and most importantly, their feelings – and made this a top priority in our lives.

But I’m realizing, and learning, and knowing, that no one else is going to care for me, love me, treasure me, more than I will care for, love and treasure myself.

It may sound selfish. But if we aren’t selfish about loving ourselves, how is anyone else supposed to love us? And isn’t that, truly what this beautiful life is all about?

I read a great article, published in Forbes and linked below, about the qualities that make an irresistible person. Now, I certainly don’t claim to be irresistible, nor do I want to be, but it does offer some really solid advice about how to be a good human being.

11 Secrets Of Irresistible People


Be honest and genuine. Be empathetic, and mean it. Be involved in what matters to you. Be you.

Yes, I like to be liked. But I like to feel good about myself more than I like to be liked. And that’s really what makes me understand that I am #1. Not because I am more important or better than anyone else. But because I value me above anyone else.

That makes me strong enough to be able to care for, and care about, others. And that is more than ok. It’s how everyone should ‘treat’ themselves.

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