Every day I have to force myself to do something, take action, be better. Every moment of being a grieving mother, living without her only baby, is a concerted effort. But I continually try. I make myself take another step, inhale another breath, sleep another night, and wake another day, because I know it is … Continue reading I made myself
There aren't many certainties in grief. It's a constant fluctuation of unpredictable emotions, an incurable and constant battle, and an inexplicable, unexplainable state of insanity. But one certainty that I think most loss-moms can agree on, and that is the uncertainty. The uncertainty of when the highs and lows, the waves, and the swings, will … Continue reading Mercy
I was watching an interview with Rainn Wilson about SoulPancake and he asked Oprah some of his favorite questions. One was, "What do you miss about being five years old?" I thought of several things instantly, but I thought of the episode yesterday as I was driving through the carwash. Do you remember how fun it … Continue reading To be five again
This concept was brought to my attention by my sweet Tia who left a note on one of my recent posts. She said that my son, my beautiful angel, left us all better than he found us. What a wonderful way of viewing his short three years on this Earth. He was here just long enough … Continue reading Leave it better than you found it
I hear this phrase every week from my grief counselor. I have learned to appreciate the words and follow the advice. But I have also determined that I have more control over the journey than I once thought. There's a process to grieving, and the stages have been researched and practiced and labeled and studied. … Continue reading Trust the journey
My baby's loss, how much I miss him, how hard it is for me to continue without him, and how I feel each and every day is a testament to my love for him, but also a reflection of how selfish I have become in grief.
Today I am celebrating. I am celebrating today. We only get so many days. A limited amount. And so many of those days pass wasted. I don't want any more wasted days. So, from now on, I am going to celebrate each and every one. Yesterday I saw a rainbow on my way home. Right … Continue reading Celebrate
Hi, baby. I wanted to take a minute to thank you. For some reason, a reason I am sure you know, and one I will someday understand - when I write to you, when I talk to you, when I pray to you, when I dream of you - I know that you hear me, … Continue reading Gratefulness
I have been witness to many selfish behaviors lately, which has led me to realize how I'm also often passing judgement on others. I can certainly work on the judgement part, but the other worries me. Today at work, I went into the kitchen to drop off a plate I had used and noticed a … Continue reading Behavior matters
Every parent wishes for 'something better' for their children.
Parenting Angels 